A Lady Always Knows When To Leave.

August 12, 2009 | Filed in: Dance, Music

I tattooed something on my forearm a few years back. It says “Truth, Beauty, Freedom, Hope and Love”

These concepts are important to me, I don’t continue on a path unless it involves at least four of the five.

The words come from a dream I had about my very first dance audition. Maybe it was more of a nightmare, but it involved me forgetting the dance combination – which I did in real life. That was something I didin’t want to revisit. But in the dream when I was getting ready to dance, I looked down on my arm and I had written a note to my 17 year old self. It was from my present self. It said:

” There will always be challenges, the theatre can be a scary place. You have had, and always will have the ability to be true, honest and beautiful with your work. Don’t worry about being judged, or being perfect. Its okay to be different. Remember. Dance to create truth, Love yourself and what you do, and have the strength and the freedom to stand up for what you believe in. If you think you can do something, than you can. Remember who you are, and who you want to be.”

In the dream, I did the combination and nailed it.

A year later I got the words tattooed on my arm in an elvish font. If you can read it, its because you think you can. Many people have no idea what it says, because they don’t expect to be able to decipher it. It doesn’t matter if they are staring straight at it. The entire point of the dream and the tattoo was perspective.

It has been almost two years since I joined the Steampunk band Abney Park. I’ve gotten to travel all over this country and across the ocean. The opportunities have been brilliant and the people I’ve met along the way sublime.

The steampunk community is amazing, and I value and respect all the talented souls I’ve had the honor of meeting.

My time with the band has taught me that I can be funnier than I expected and vampier and sexier than I ever allowed myself to be. I became braver about my body image, found my voice and learned that being pseudo famous is kinda wierd. My favorite thing about AP shows was talking to all of you and making all of you smile.

Despite all of this, For personal reasons, I have decided to leave Abney Park.

I will continue to be part of the community and its wonderful events.

I hope you will follow Splinter Dance Company, and my work in it. It is a project that means a lot to me.

Its immensly important for me to put out work that enhances my life, and the lives of others. I want to produce work that is truthful, beautiful and hopeful. I want to create a respectful working environment for my dancers. I want to enable them to be free as people and artists. I want to create work that I love and believe in. Rehearsals are already underway with our 12 dancers. Stacy, Kathryn, Robert, Robin, Malia, Justice, Amanda, Laurel, Maia, Nasim and Jaime.

This decision puts me back on track with who I am, and the type of people I need to be working with.

If you would like to audition for the band, here is Robert’s Craigslist ad.

With Love,

- Ms. Finn von Claret

42 Comments so far
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I know I’ll miss your energy from the shows and from the music. I look forward to seeing your work with the Splinter Dance Company.

For what it’s worth, the Girly Girl has been talking about taking dance lessons since the Sunday show. Do you have any recommendations?

Wow, best of luck with the dance troupe! It was a pleasure getting to watch you perform with the band, and I can only imagine greater things in the future for you.

So sorry to hear you’re leaving the band – it was wonderful watching you dance as Herr Drosselmeyer’s Doll! Even more amazing though was the performance I got to see last year, at the Edwardian Ball in San Francisco, where you had the space to move and really shine. I very much hope to see your current project! You are so very talented, and I look forward to seeing anything you decide to undertake. Best of luck!

Oh Finn! You are loved and will be missed by so many.

That’s my girl.
I am very proud of you and am lucky to count you as a friend. Congratulations on following your heart. Also, you’re a badass.

Yeah, what Libby said. Having had to do something similar, I can obviously relate. So if you need to talk about it, I’m here for you sister! You have my number, don’t be afraid to use it.

Finn, my best wishes to you and Splinter Dance Company. I’m so glad you are following your heart and listening to yourself. It has been a pleasure to meet you and chat with you in the past, and I do hope there will be chances in the future.

good for you girl.. hopefully i will still see you occasionally about the square!!

and good luck to AP in finding a worthy new addition

At this point, we probably have enough people to form some sort of Algonquin Round Table.

Ich habe echt Stolz auf dich dass du gegen solche Herausforderungen so klar kommen kannst.

Following the calling of one’s heart is the only way to live. congratulations. I trust is will see you soon.

Finn, my you succeed in your endeavors and it was wonderful meeting you both times that I saw the band play.

Bully for you lady! I’m eager to see what you do next and in complete agreement with Libby and Jean-Paul on your badassity!

I’ve really enjoyed seeing you perform with AP and getting to know you. You will most certainly be missed. Hope to see you around and about town!

I’m stunned sweet lass. While I certainly wish you all the best in your future endevors, I know I’ll miss the pinache and style that you’ve added to Abney Park through your dance and character. Hopefully you’ll still be a ‘guest’ musician in future gigs with them.

If I should manage to make it up to Seattle for any reason, I still would love to get together with you for a photoshoot.

May you reach success in all you do, and enjoy doing every part of it.
When your job is doing something you absolutely love, you shall never work a day in your life.
So keep doing what you love to do, and there will always be a bright future.

My wife and I got to see you with AP at Metro con in Tampa. We wish you the best and will miss your style and playfulness on stage.

Wow! I was shocked when I heard the news. I hope last Sunday’s show was not your last.
You will do just fine with your Splinter Dance Company. You are a great lady and we will all miss you.

I admit that I am stunned. I will miss your energy and what you bring to Abney Punk tremendously. I wish you every success with Splinter and I admire your courage & vision & your determination to be true to yourself. And I will always remember your kindness to me last Feb.when I showed up in your bar the night before Steampunk Party II and said “You look like Finn Von Claret!”. Instead of being offended, you went out of your way to make a stranger feel very welcome. May you find success everywhere you look & may you be engulfed by love and life & art’s blessings!

Good for you for recognizing what you need to do in order to do what you need to feed your soul and your art. I hope I’ll get to see what you’re doing with Splinter next time I’m in Seattle. Cheers.

I’m glad you are focusing your energy on your dance company. You know your family always has your back.

Love from the House of Bat and Bee

So glad that I had the chance to meet you and see you dance with Abney Park, (and share the Jamesons!). Best of luck in everything you do, I know you’ll do it well

I am so excited to see where you and your dance company go. I have major faith in you, and believe you’ve made the right decision for all involved. Love!

Miss von Claret,
I’ll tremendously miss enjoying you perform with AP.
It takes a lot of courage and strength to leave what you know, and follow your heart into the unknown. I wish you success in all your endeavours!

You’ll be missed~
But I hope everything goes well for you!

Finn, you will always be so dear to me. I’ve loved performing with you with the Ghosts Project and watching you dance with Abney Park. I’m sure you’ll bring that truth and beauty to everything you do.

Darling Erica,
You are such a sweet lady. I love the key you gave me at the Edwardian Ball. I know we will perform together again soon.
- F

Martin and Gothtart,
You two are a hoot. I love twitter. I felt like I knew you before I met you and both Nathaniel felt so special for the “gift” in our green room before the show. You were so helpful when we were all there, even helping us contact our London venue, when sleep deprivation rendered us retarded.

Hey Jake,
You crack me up. Your such a wonderful soul. I’ll see you at SteamCon. HUGGG

Danke Schatz. Ich liebe dich

Thank you for your wonderful performances over the years–sorry I only got to see one of them (Saloncon 08–thanks for the shot prior to the show).

Love You and Mel Jean Paul.
You guys are some of the sweetest folks. I’m so glad I get to be part of your lives

Love ya Libbylicious. Your rad incarnate.

Like most things, I stumbled onto AP by accident, clicking my way through other blogs. My first introduction was a youtube clip of you doing Herr Dross. Was hooked since.

Do what you love and love what you do. At the end of the day, that’s all that matters.

Ms. Finn – You are beautiful.

that Airship’s a wonderful place to survey the territory, but a dancer’s place is still on the ground for the time being – may thee live and prosper until we dance amongst the stars.

I’m going to miss you voice and energy during the show, but I’m sure you made this decision wisely. I hope that you keep doing what you do because you love it, not because it just pays the bills.

It has come full circle. I was at the AP show at Bar Sin which I think was your first, and then again at the Columbia last Sunday.

Your talent is amazing, and I wish you all the best on the future projects.

I’m very sorry to hear you’re leaving Abney Park. I discovered the band while I still worked at a library (laid off now) on YouTube because I could listen and work at the same time. I will say your dance had freedom to it that was unbelievable. You just went with the music and the moment. I don’t know much history of the band but I believe the woman before you was also a dancer and she was very stiff and stilted. I know it’s not a compliment to her but there was such a contrast between the two of you. I can’t dance at all and am still recovering from plantar fasciitis in both feet. I’m a year and a half into recovery. Three and a half still to go so my dancing days are far away. Good luck with your future plans.

Lisa

I will miss seeing you with the band, but wish you nothing but the best of luck. You have definitely brought spunk and a playfulness that will be lost. Lifting a Jameson in your honor. Slainte!

Totally bummed that you will be leaving the band. Having seen AP several times, I was delighted with the level of talent you brought to the band when I last saw them at DragonCon. Your sense of style really elevated the band to a higher level, and your presence finally made them worth listening to. I read Robert’s ad on craigslist… all too obvious what happened there. You must have stepped on his toes during one of your twirls! Now if only hee culd lurn to spelle!

Hey Finn,

I found it very interesting that you have had dreams about your chosen profession. I sometimes have dreams that I am DJing and have a total brain freeze. It is the most terrifying experience in my dream, but when I wake up I always think about how silly something so trivial affected me so much in my dream. I think it is a sign that our passions really do influence our lives in ways we never imagine. I’m glad to know you landed on your feet in your dream, and I hope you continue that trend in life. I hope you can still make it out for Steamcon, because Martin and I both think you are an awesome person, and we’d love for you to catch us performing with our full lineup. Cheers!

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About

Finn von Claret is a transient hailing from Seattle via the far off lands of Germany, California and Monaco.

She enjoys blogging, hair color, karaoke, tea, Etsy, carnies, Jameson and tattoos. When she is not enjoying such self destructive activities, currently she dances with Jerboa Dance Company and seeks odd collaborative projects.

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